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Wiping floors with men

Most men are born more playful and amusing than women

One would have to have a heart of stone not to laugh at the story of Andrew Gilbert, 24, of Handforth, Cheshire; he is, or was, the Midland Bank trainee who was forced to mop the office floor by Kathryn Douse, a woman manager of only 21. An industrial tribunal found last week that she was guilty of sex discrimination against him; it upheld his claims that she was rude and patronising to him, treated him less favourably than female employees and - shocking to relate - even went so far as to exclude him from conversations and indeed his job. She actually refused to include him in "chit-chat" about weekends and personal matters, which she had with women. The tribunal awarded him pounds 4,700 for loss of income and injury to his feelings. "I was definitely a victim of girl power," he said. "On the day I was sacked I went home to my mum's in tears."

We should not snigger. Humiliating junior employees is wrong. Sex discrimination is wrong. All the same, almost every working woman over a certain age has at least one much worse story to tell - stories that went unrecognised and uncompensated because we were so determined to keep working, no matter how badly men behaved, no matter how threatened men felt, and no matter how much men tried to exclude us from conversations. As a result, young Mr Gilbert, with his brief and early trial by female fire, sounds to many of us like a bit of a drip - not made of such stern stuff as many women, or, apparently, as Ms Douse.

There are bullies everywhere, of both sexes, and some people, of both sexes, find it harder to stand up to them than others. It is probably right that there should be industrial tribunals to protect the weak from their bullies, although appealing to an industrial tribunal is the kiss of death to any career. It is probably right that we should be subjected to endless articles and programmes about bullying in the office, and unnecessary stress in the workplace, dreary though they are, because these are evils that have been unrecognised for far too long. Yet this story attracted a great deal more attention than it deserved, far more than it might have attracted had the sexes been reversed. I put this down to the female mud-wrestling factor - the perverse excitement that the gentlemen of the press, and some of the ladies too, find in women behaving badly, or rather in women doing something rather repellent that men may often do, but that women are not supposed ever to indulge in.

I would not go so far, though, as Lesley Riddoch in The Guardian, who sees alarming signs of "bitch hunting" in this story. It does, however, raise some interesting questions about women in power. Feminists seem to be muddled about this. On the one hand they say that woman are equal to men at work and can do the same job for the same pay. On the other hand they say that women are different and indeed better - more caring and less aggressive and hierarchical - and at the same time need preferential treatment: positive discrimination and family-friendly hours. Some women make no apology for trying to advance the interests of women colleagues at work whenever possible, and I feel some sneaking sympathy for this. Tit for tat.

My own view is that women vary hugely, just as men do, but if one must generalise, then I would say that women tend to make better bosses than men. It is certainly an accepted truth of management theory that women make better middle managers. I don't know whether they make better bosses right up to the top level, right up to the dizzy heights above the glass ceiling; I have not worked for a woman at that level, although I have worked for several very able women just below it. But in my experience at various levels, women bosses tend to be more direct and straightforward than men, and rather more businesslike and conscientious, with greater attention to detail. They make clear quickly what they think and want. The disadvantage of this is that they tend to be rather serious, or at any rate less playful - I hope all the funny, witty women I have worked with will forgive me for this - whereas men seem to treat work as a continuing game, however important it really is to them. One day perhaps the genome map will make the reasons for all this clear; for now it is simply a prejudice of mine that most men are born more playful and amusing than most women, just as they are born to be better but more reckless drivers.

Joking and good humour seem to be important manly virtues at work; a man is not supposed to make heavy weather of anything. Women bosses, by contrast, seem to avoid joking, perhaps because it so quickly becomes teasing. And one man's teasing is another woman's harassment.

One of the greatest advantages of women bosses is that they tend to be careful of other people's feelings, and to anticipate them - something that is particularly valuable to other women. Of course if a woman decides to be nasty, she can do it as well as any man. But generally women are not inconsiderate or thoughtlessly unkind; they are naturally concerned to see that subordinates do well and feel well.

Perhaps - if my many kind and funny male bosses will forgive me for saying so - that is why it is so difficult for women to reach the very top.

The Sunday Telegraph | Sunday, September 06, 1998

Comments:

Sorry. I must disagree. In my experience, my female bosses were more reactive and less professional than my male bosses. Most of the female bosses that I had clearly showed favoritism to their female employees over the men and were always pushing the diversity envelope. They focused on the female employees' development and helped them much more than the men. I have held positions in some of the best companies in the world and am currently working in a fantastic company. My boss, a female, is extremely inept at times dealing with her employees. She plays favoritism all the time (most of the time favoring the women) and has a terrible habit of humiliating a handful of her employees particularly when they are conducting part of a meeting before several people. It is the same people all of the time. She can become irrational at the drop of a dime. Based upon my experience and observations, in my next position I will look to report to a male instead of a female.

Posted by: Victor | 9 Apr 2005 12:40:02

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